We adopted twin girls from Russia 13 years ago. We knew that they would take more care and time to settle in to our family than our bio kids, but we never anticipated where we have come. We have had years of working with them and looking for help and assistance, only to never really find the help we needed.
They have had good moments, but overall the constant lying, stealing and manipulation have taken a toll on our family. It has been difficult to maintain good friendships, church life and other normal activities due to the constant behavior from the girls.
We are currently navigating trying to determine what is best for them as they move toward adulthood. We have tried many different therapies and practitioners without any real results. One of our girls is in a non-therapeutic boarding school for RAD girls. Our other daughter, who we had hoped would improve with her sister being out of the house, has not proved to be the case.
Both girls are manipulative, conflict averse, lying, stealing and lack any real responsibility for their actions. They will not take any correction or direction from us, so it has become increasingly difficult to prepare them for life outside our home. We are also not dealing with them well in our home, as we are burned out from years of trying with no real movement.
We would like to have a relationship with the girls as they move into adulthood, but feel at this point, neither they nor we are doing well in the constant turmoil at home.
